And I will give you love

[holocene]

(I resist the urge to explain myself, explain myself away. I tell myself to just let my words be there. Allow them to be there. So, here they are.)

hand around my throat
come back to finish what you started
left me gasping for air
left me drowning forever
remember enough to know I don’t remember
looking for light makes the room darker
makes me spin in circles
makes me bite my own tail

cut myself trying to cut you
hate myself trying to hate you
poison in my mouth
I try to spit it out but swallow more
every time I flee I run into your arms
light a fire but it doesn’t give me warmth

hate pours out in tears
stains on my cheeks
it’s a cage with no key
bars meters apart and still I can’t walk out
you planted a seed in my brain
overgrowing weeds break my castle walls slowly
looks almost pretty the way they crumble
but you were a cannon ball
an earthquake

I dream of you and what you did
shirts drenched in sweat
dried tears in the corners of my eyes
sadness sticks to my skin like resin
I try to wash it off but stay dirty
anger rises in my chest
blood boils with hate
want to lace my fingers around your neck same as you did
hand so big throat so small
I kick and scream and break my legs and rip my vocal chords

you’re a monster
a shell
void
you are the absence of love
the lack of joy
darkness twists in your chest
you put yourself in my head
made me turn against myself
little soldier shooting bullets on an empty beach

I fall and I fall
I rise for myself
I walk out and the sun shines for me
the flowers grow where I walk in colours you can’t see
I made myself in spite of you
love turns on me and I love again
you come back and I survive again
dusk heals my wounds
trees rock me to sleep
the stars are my friends and their light blinds you

you stole and took what wasn’t yours
no peace will touch your heart
no birds will sing on the day you die
silence will fill your grave
and I will stand above it
look down on your casket

and I will give you love

[Oceantide]

I appreciate this - thank you

[Scars]

WOW! holocene,
such beauty from pain.
this really spoke to me

thanks for sharing
scars

[Progress]

Holocene,

This. Is. Amazing.

I swung by Poetry to help me gently sign off this morning so I can get to some household tasks.

Wow, just wow. Your poem speaks to my heart. It is gorgeously written. So much beauty created from so much pain. Hope. Survival. Love wins. What a message, sent in such a moving and beautifully gift-wrapped package of words.

You are so talented and I’m so glad you shared. Your words, like all of ours, deserve space on the page. Pls keep sharing!

Progress

[orangeflower]

Thanks for sharing! Beautiful!