Yuck work week meetings.. rant

[coconuts]

Okay I just need to rant. This week Monday thru Wednesday we have to be in meetings with another school in our district. Just my luck I got placed at a table with a former best friend and the table next to my ex. This is so frustrating. My friend was with me when all my memories flooded my life and when everything fell apart. But she needed me to be weak. She needed to be in top. When I told her that her always saying "well at least you.....". She just always had to belittle my struggles. I told her at one time in a very nice way that it made me feel like she thought I was weak and pathetic for struggling with different things than she was. And that my struggles were hard. It was a very tearful discussion after which she refused to talk to me again. She shunned me at school, tried to make admin dislike me, etc etc etc. I ended up transferring schools at the end of the year to get away from her.

Second is my ex. This is from a really tough time in my life that I am ashamed of. But when my husband and I divorced this same friend set me up with this guy. ( Nothing a true friend should have done given my emotional state at the time). I was weak. My whole world had fallen apart. My husband had become abusive to me and the kids and we left him. I was trying to figure myself out. I was rethinking myself. I had attempted suicide just 6 months earlier and then gone through the stuff with husband, kicked him out, finally divorced and was a single mom to 8 kids. So she set me up with this guy. He said all the right things, I fell for it all. Within a few months we got really serious and then we actually married. The morning after our marriage I realized what a mistake it was and we literally filed for divorce a week later. Yeah I was divorced twice in one year. I'm not proud of this time but I also recognize I was Ina a time of major transition and I've learned to be a bit kinder to myself regarding this. Anyways the last words this guy ever spoke to me ( knowing my history of the trafficking) were , "you're a whore, you'll always be a whore, it's all youll ever be good for, I married you cause I thought it'd be fun to live with one but I cant stand you. ". It was hurtful and cut right to the pain. I get that was his point he was just jabbing at my weaknesses. He was fighting dirty so to say.

But here I am with one person between me and the former best friend and sitting right in front of and one person over my ex. This is rough.

[EasyStreet]

Incredibly rough, coconuts, you don't deserve this at all. My heart is with you.

[Noname]

Oh ugh. So sorry that you went through all that at a time when you were vulnerable. And sorry that you're stuck having to be around them. Do you have any safe people there with you? Take care of yourself, coconuts.

[there]

Oh jeez, coconut z,
Reading this for the first time today.
Was called a whore by an ex boyfriend for liking sex. And by step sister. Neither is in my life now.
It's Friday, so you're through the actual event.
A while back when my brother said , " At least you..." , I blew up at him.
I hope it's better now the whole meeting is over. If Thinking of you and supporting you, with calm, empathy and hugs and even more if it's still affecting you.

[coconuts]

Thanks easy, noname, and there

Yes it's over. Finally. I have one more meeting with them all Monday morning then I should be good until mid September.

So my husband found out he got moved around and he will now have to work with these two or at least interact with them as well. He's not exactly happy. I told him we will figure it out. He is trying to find a way to talk to the person in charge and make some changes. We will see.

The former friend by Wednesday was trying to buddy up to me, telling me how she wants to come work in our building. Seems to me like she burned too many bridges in the building she is now and is trying to run. Luckily no positions are open and hopefully it stays that way for a few years.

[there]

coconuts,
Too close for comfort and they are hard to elude.
Glad it looks like you're spared for at least a few years.
Phew of relief for you.