Miss this place soooo badly

[dkangel]

No. I've only ever had one. Can't imagine ever having another

[HealingHearts]

Maybe you can share here
We will listen
HH

[dkangel]

thank you so much for hearing me. i don't know how to express myself without my T. I can't imagine my life without her-i worry how I am ever going to exist without her.

The nightmares have started back-the panic attacks sneaking back up on me...trying to keep them at bay, but I don't know how much longer I can keep them away. I feel like I am awfully close to that dark spiral of darkness....

[HealingHearts]

Well that sounds like a scary place.
Can you ask T for a referral?
Someone she trusts?
In the mean time what can you do for grounding?
It is really good you are using your words here
That us very brave and is a big step.

[HealingHearts]

When we get panic attacks sometimes we do not know that is what they are. We have index cards next to our bed to read and remind us when we are in the midst of an attack. Sometimes it helps ... When we remember.

Do you have anything that helps?

[dkangel]

I'm afraid to ask for a referral. I don't know y. Maybe worried abt disappointing my T? This is a place I have never been. She will write me if I write her and I think I could call her but I'm afraid of overstepping the boundaries that now exist bc of her retirement. She gave me some index cards a few yrs ago. I think I still have them. Good idea. I'm going to look for those. I just wonder if I will always feel this way. This has been going on wayy too long.

[HealingHearts]

(((Dkangel)))
Hi! I was thinking of you as I drove to T tonight.
Did you find the cards your T gave you?
Did you call her?
I do not think it would be overstepping boundaries AT ALL to call and ask for a referral. I bet she would be glad to hear from you. You deserve to have support. You deserve to have a T.
HH

[tommy]

dkangel,

I agree with HealingHearts, that you definitely deserve support and I imagine your T would agree as well. I hope you will use any tools and resources available to you and please know you have much support here.

[dkangel]

I'm so empty tonight. I wish my T were talking with me right now.

[HealingHearts]

we are here
do you want to say more?