Contempt for Louise L. Hay

[ChipmunksRunFree]

I deeply deeply dislike her. Is that ok?

Because in the negative reviews of her book, people have died and/or suffered as a result of believing in her teachings.

Because my abuser's wife recommended I read her books.

Because I am not to blame for what happened to me.

I despise her!!

[greendiva23]

Hi ChipmunksRunFree,

I am not familiar with this particular author, however I know that it is completely okay for you to deeply dislike her! You are entitled to your beliefs and feelings about her, 100%.

You are also COMPLETELY right when you say that what happened wasn't your fault. It wasn't.

((((Gentle hugs))))

Greendiva

[there]

Also not a big Louise Hay fan. For all the good she could be doing, she undercuts it all by not dealing with this 1 issue. I have felt infuriated by her approach that comes across as reproach. 'Ok, everybody who's dying of starvation today....it's your own fault!!!'
A LOT of people feel as we do, CRF. It's such a glaring omission on her part. And she's never addressed the issue. Conscience, please?!

I like some of the books by others published by her company. I read them regardless, but she is a sad case.

[hummingbird]

I read her book, You Can Heal Your Life, back in the 80s when I was just beginning to wake up to what had happened to me. I tried very hard, in my naïve eagerness, to apply what she wrote about using affirmations to help me love myself. I wanted to love myself so badly!

I could never accept the line that "we choose our parents" and create our reality. But I was just learning about shame and my Inner Child so I tried the affirmations and the mirror work.

And everything got worse for me! I believe now, looking back, that I was working only with my conscious mind and not aware of the deep unconscious wounds I carry. I was unaware at that time that I had been sexually abused. When that awareness surfaced, my fragile alcohol and eating disorder recovery were swept away.

Pete Walker's Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder book (and his other book) and Beverly Engel's It Wasn't Your Fault are helping me so much right now.

[Butterfly Q]

I reckon she's got some good stuff and also some total BS but it's all down to filtering that out. I know what works for me and also what seriously won't I don't believe I could heal cancer, and I don't believe I picked my parents cause that would be narcissistic and stop them from taking the responsibility for their ongoing lack of parenting. But trying to stay positive, and appreciating and learning to like myself that is an important belief/feeling to have. There's good tips on how to be nice to yourself.

[Fleur]

Hi....

Just my 2 cents .....

When pregnant with my son, we listened to Louise L. Hay's CD about love and peace
As son is very secure in himself, that daily listening might have helped

However, the idea we choose our parents, when one knows the biology, just doesn't ring true for me

Also, having had exposure to a number of people who had abusive childhood, some of what is suggested is ineffective at best, damaging at worse -- and I wonder how many people have attempted to implement her ideas, only to fail and take out their frustration upon themselves, thinking " something must be wrong with me"?

I'm happy for Ms Hay to have helped herself and those people who find her methods suit them

For the average survivor, I'm not so sure Louise L. Hay is the best reference/resource


Cheers

[freefromlies]

I have read You Can Heal Your Life [1984] and it is a positive message written with good intentions but my belief validated by my experience is that forgiveness does not work in the context of healing the soul. I believe in emotional authenticity and if I feel hatred then I feel hatred. I fear that the messages of unconditional love and forgiveness encourages dependency on abusers when what victims need is the mental and emotional freedom to heal from their traumata and be themselves which is their birthright. When my suffering is played down or I am told my negative feelings is my ego I experience intense feelings of rage and disappointment. It is very painful. I became so disillusioned with new age spirituality that I am now an atheist and I generally avoid the literature and certainly do not recommend it. There is an exception and that is mindfulness because practising mindfulness is a pillar of my life. Thanks for sharing ChipmunksRunFree, I appreciate your honesty.

[freefromlies]

I now experience intense guilt feelings for being too extreme in my above post so if I can clarify that my belief is forgiveness could be arrived at but only as the last step in the healing process and should never be encouraged or attempted. The priority must be developing compassion for yourself and that must include finding the courage to rebel against the abuser for the injustices you suffered.

[reisha]

i dont like her either, for many-a the reasons stated.

*possible trigger warning*
the way she says what she says does imply fault & that REALLY bugs me. yet i *think* what she's tryin to get at is the idea ... of many Eastern philosophies. the idea that the soul ('course, this supposes ya beLIEve in souls....) chooses its life lessons prior to birth. (who in their rite mind would.....?!?!!) or, that we ~volunteer~ to endure extreme sufferin - (& im forgetful/not real clear on those reasons).
in either event, it takes a VERY STRONG soul to do this. racks up 'good karma' points. a thing to keep in mind is that (again, ass-u-me'n the beLIEf....) a souls' reality is far more expansive, more 'cosmic' than that of a mere mortal earthling.
so, i s'pose if ya subscribe to any-a that 'nonsense', any incarnation could be ANY THING, ANY WHERE, ANY TIME - life forms we (as humans) cant conceive of. dimensions beyond our imagining.
toss in the laws of thermo-dynamics - energy can be neither created or destroyed, only transformed & it can lead to sum pretty heady, heavy phoolisophical debates & ideas
theres a part-a me that kinda likes, groks on the notion. but the way LLH presents it, ALOT gets lost in the translation & my no likey, not one lil bit!!!

[pandapaw]

There's some quite wacky stuff on her youtube channel. There's a chap who dances around a lot and some ludicrously broad statements, verging well into LOL territory. Stuff like cold 'left-wing' thinking being replaced by the age of 'love'. I'm not aware of that claim being mainstream amongst academic historians yet!

We've got a load of these sort of spiritual/therapeutic roadshow-type events going on in England. I didn't realise how big they'd become. Some friends have got really into it - but they are going along expecting answers to deep-seated problems that almost certainly need a guided one-to-one approach.

Trying to look generously, I suppose this sort of stuff helps people to at least start to acknowledge their feelings and loosen up emotionally a bit, but I don't think Ms Hay has either the knowledge or empathy to drift her philosophies into complex areas such as abuse....so, yes, a thumbs down here as well.