still going on

This is a place for old members to come and share how their healing journeys have progressed.
Its also a place for those members to reconnect and share their experiences.

Moderators: Harmony, ajei

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VAC
Member
Posts: 588
Joined: Wed Jul 27, 2011 1:16 am
Location: Southern United States

Re: still going on

Post by VAC » Sat Jan 28, 2017 11:50 pm

Jonesy and Ajei,

Thank you....I often think of the many times I have been on chat or read the posts of others and been incredibly stirred. In the early days of being on this site, many times there would be multiple people on chat.

Someone would say something and i would have to leave, because an image or impression had come back to me.

The saddest part of this whole thing is that my dad hated his own life, rather his own being, and consciously and subconsciously tried to destroy everyone that he loved. It was a constant thing.

It was ugly and deep and foreboding.

Mother was his caretaker and keeper and in many ways, his protector and enabler.

When I write about my folks, I am in no way trying to justify or deny the evil done: it makes me wonder about many things.

And I in no way am trying to force others to handle their circumstances as I have handled mine.

I am very close to someone who was deeply abused and neglected by their parents and step-mother: one has died, and the other two beg for them to visit, but it has been said so many times with evil mind games played, they can't bear to go back even though death is soon for those who remain. It is what they have to do to have peace.

I have stood with a number of people in the past at the grave of one who treated them horribly and there was no peace in life....sometimes things need to be said even then, and it brings healing when it is the right thing to do. The threat is gone...

I know my folks led desperate lives....

My dad had classic oppositional behavior. He was trying to prove something all his life. I can only surmise his childhood from what I know about him, but I was trashed by teachers who taught him throughout my elementary education, and it had nothing to do with his behavior...

....the family secrets.

It is an odd thing to have known in my heart my dad was abused as a child for years before I had recall. I can remember being around my dad and uncles and knowing something was not right in the way they talked to him.

Enough said, but thanks for your comments,

VAC

I guess one of my greatest hopes is that when my life is over, I am not filled with regret.

there
Member
Posts: 3183
Joined: Mon Aug 15, 2011 12:41 am
Location: New England, USA

Re: still going on

Post by there » Sun Jan 29, 2017 12:28 am

((((VAC))))
Reading latest here. Glad I did. Hope you continue to heal from medical issues.
Graduated from Hardship Univ with Highest Honors
You are precious beyond price.

VAC
Member
Posts: 588
Joined: Wed Jul 27, 2011 1:16 am
Location: Southern United States

Re: still going on

Post by VAC » Wed Feb 01, 2017 5:24 am

Hello,

Thanks to everyone here.....

VAC

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