Dark Secret, Black Night

[anna]

Yawning,
Rubbing eyes
Half asleep.

There's a large shadowy figure at the door.
Panic overwhelms,
Tears well up,

Who's there?
Where's teddy?
Is it a monster?

Grabbing Teddy,
Finding comfort,
Calming down

Shadowy figure walks in,
Oh no, oh no, no, no, no


He sits on the edge of the bed,
It's Daddy,

Not again,
The ball in my tummy gets bigger.
Oh, no, please no

Rolling up like a ball under the blanket,
Trying to hid like a turtle in it's shell.
Sssshh, it's okay,
Such a good girl last night,
Be a good girl again for me sweetheart.

Please...
Ssshh, just be a good girl.
Rubbing my back,
Coaxing me out of a ball,
His big hands rub my shoulders,
Slowly moving down my front,
Now flat, I know what happens next.

Ppplleasse,
I stutter, knowing I shouldn't speak.

SMACK!

My whole body shudders with fear.
Remember what happens to bad girls...
Biting my toungue, tasting blood,
I close my eyes and cry.
My will broken.

His hand continue moving,
Muffled whimpers fill the room with every stroke.
Sssshh, that's it sweetheart.

My nighty,
Taken off swiftly,
And crumpled in his hand
Like a thin sheet of paper.

Untying His robe, letting it fall to the floor
His eyes linger
His pace quickens,
Air, hot and thick with musk
His breath quickens too.

He rolls me over,
Crying harder,
Knowing I can't help it,
He rubs my back and whispers,
Ssshh, be a good girl.
Fumbling with something in His hand,
He continues to shush me.

Then something cold and squishy hits my bottom,
He rubs it in,
Pushing His finger inside
I cry out into the pillow
Ssshh, it's okay, just relax

His weight shifts,
Hands holding my hips in place,
I feel it, pressing slowly and deeply
He lets out a moan,
I scream out in pain,
Muffled by the pillow.
And everything goes black.

[darkshadow]

My heart aches for that little girl alone in the dark (((Anna)))

[amalivo6]

o ((((((((((((anna)))))))))))) so sorry

[misc]

anna
im so sorry..
having to remember is so terrible..
you are safe now.
we are all with you..
and we all care....

[breezy1170]

reading this just put chills up my spin. your words is the feelings i have that just dont come out in words. thank you for writting this. it put me in shock for a min but made me a lil stronger.

[Xanthia]

Hi anna,

Holding your young girl self. It sounds horrific, so scary and so NOT wanted. Thank you for your courage in sharing these painful memories.

I'm hoping life holds many positives for you at the moment.

Wishing you a very happy birthday followed by a great 12 months. May you celebrate your special day to start your personal new year.

Sending whatever you would most like for your healing journey.

With care,