In the garden

[celticharpist]

I grew up in a world of gas lighting and constant criticism. I am still a non-person in my mothers eyes. I can do nothing right. Even my facebook posts are subject to her never ending criticism. According to her, I could cause someone to want to commit suicide. I should never have been born.

When I came to this city, I knew that I needed a way to affirm life in a positive way that was just for me. I knew I needed a garden.

My garden is small. I've spent the last 3 summers slowly building raised beds and mulching, putting in fruit bushes and trees, bringing fertility back to the soil. I go out and and I become part of it. Birds, raccoons, skunks, chipmunks, mice and other animals all come there. It is my haven...my place of solitude. But more importantly to me, my garden is a tiny patch of earth that I can look after and tend for whoever it comes after me. In it, I become not an extraneous individual with no purpose but the steward of life. Four years ago, it was barren. Today, life is coming back. Every scoop of earth brings up earthworms. Everywhere I look, more plants are growing.

To her, I am nothing. To that 18 X 36 piece of ground, I am everything.

[IMA]

Oh my goodness that so was beautiful, I love how you have so much insight you have for yourself.

[celticharpist]

Thank you. It is hard won insight, believe me. Its funny how strong the call of life can be. I'm really only starting to appreciate it. I spent so much time running away from the pain and not actually fighting it.

[IMA]

Hey

How are you doing and anything new with your garden.

[there]

Hi, celticharpist,
Very cool name:)
I really liked reading about your garden and relationship with it.
I hope you're doing ok.