Feeling angry!!!

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flowermelt
Member
Posts: 32
Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2018 6:38 pm

Feeling angry!!!

Post by flowermelt »

"Abuser control, manipulate and make you feel like you are the one with a problem. Stand up, speak out and take back your life. You are not to blame".

That was a quote i found earlier. Today i have been feeling pretty angry towards my abuser and great rage! :x

It's because of how he had tried to turn it around on me, make me out to be the liar, as if i was the sick one, and it angers me so much when i think about it somedays! Today i have been in a stinking mood because i'm feeling angry and aggressive towards him! :x

But i am know i am not a bad person! I guess the anger is a good thing because it shows i know he is the wrong one and one who did me wrong! It just makes me uncontrollably angry to even think about how bad he has treated me! :x

Maybe this is all apart of the healing process? Today i have been moody, angry and absolutely FUMING!!! I feel like even approaching my abuser if i were to seem him! I just feel INCREDIBLE hatred and anger and i hate feeling this way so much, it hurts to feel this bitter towards someone!

I want him to die so bad! And i also feel intense hate and anger towards his family for not believing me!!!

Love flowermelt xxx
Last edited by Harmony on Sun Oct 14, 2018 3:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: edited trigger indicator from MT to NT due to no triggering language
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Harbor
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 336
Joined: Fri Aug 31, 2018 6:52 am

Re: Feeling angry!!!

Post by Harbor »

Hi flowermelt

Yes, anger can be a good sign. It is common to experience the full range of emotions as part of healing. Please make sure that you are caring for yourself and are thinking through any negative thoughts before acting on them. We don't want to stoop to behavior that is beneath us -we're better than that.
"'Safe Harbor' is a state of mind... it's the place - in reality or metaphor - to which one goes in times of trouble or worry. It can be a friendship, marriage, church, garden, beach, poem, prayer, or song." -Luanne Rice
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solana
Member
Posts: 477
Joined: Sat Sep 15, 2018 2:25 am

Re: Feeling angry!!!

Post by solana »

hi flowermelt,

i think it's good to be angry sometimes. while i wouldn't ever act on these feelings, i can totally relate to wishing death upon abusers.

i'm glad to hear you're directing your feelings of anger towards the people who deserve it. this shows you're putting the blame where it belongs. good for you!
You are stronger than you know.
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flowermelt
Member
Posts: 32
Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2018 6:38 pm

Re: Feeling angry!!!

Post by flowermelt »

Hi guys, i definitely wouldn't stoop to any low behaviour. Though i've had temptations but i had to keep reminding myself i am better! My abuser just angers me so much and his family are so horrible. The way they covered for him, and tried to make me look like the liar and the bad person.

I hate them so much it takes my breath away! I know they DESPISE me but i couldn't give a damn. It wasn't me that practically ripped the family in half, it was my abuser that did that, their FATHER! And yet they see me as the bad person. And the wrong person. It just angers me so so much!!

If i see them about they'll give me dirty looks and i just think, "what the f*** is your problem? How can you POSSIBLY have the cheek to be angry at me after what your dad did to ME!!!!!!????". Unbelievable!

I know they have written nasty things about me on FB and social media, but i would never lower myself to their scummy behaviour. How low can you get writing lies about a family member on social media? They are truly pathetic. I had a little prep talk with myself today and reassured myself i am better than them! They think they are so big and hard picking on a young girl... I think karma always gets people like that.

His daughter is the biggest nastiest stuck little bitch in the whole wide world! I don't think i could hate a person more if i tried!!! I know they're only trying to get to me and make me feel low. I just want to go back to uni and show them all how sad and pathetic they really are... thinking they could destroy me like that!

I don't think they'll ever stop saying nasty stuff about me and i have kinda accepted that. In the end people are just going to see them for the bitter horrible people that they are!

Love flowermelt xxx
Last edited by Jonesy on Sat Oct 20, 2018 9:09 am, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Changed MT to ST for use of profanity
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solana
Member
Posts: 477
Joined: Sat Sep 15, 2018 2:25 am

Re: Feeling angry!!!

Post by solana »

i hear you. someone covered for my abuser as well, and if you ask me, people who cover are just as bad as, if not worse than, the abusers themselves.

i don't know if you see this as an option right now, but if you do, you may want to think about removing them from your life completely, or at least avoiding them as much as possible. you don't deserve their bitterness. you are not what they think of you. you are better than them. we can't control how others react, but we can can chose not to let them define us.

sitting with you. feeling the anger with you.
You are stronger than you know.
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